Thursday, September 22, 2011

when to wonder.

i'm beginning to think, at some point, the thinking stops on its own. after thought after thought, wonder after wonder, everything gets very quiet. very still. almost as if there is literally nothing left to question, because you've already asked it all. the problem is the questions are still unanswered. left hanging. gone into hiding for a bit. at least for the night. waiting for the moment when they can finally be addressed or consciously ignored. but they never, ever disappear.

it rarely helps - the overthinking. in fact, it seems to create a lot of extra worry. but it can't be helped. and while i've tried in the past to "fix" it, there's no getting around it. i am an overthinker, period. maybe it's my instinct, and instead of feeling it in my heart or gut, i think it instead. my instincts as thoughts.

how do you get rid of a question you can't answer right away? in my case, you can't. you just think it to death. how do you let go of a question you're afraid to release? when you choose to let it go - the question you're afraid to ask - more often than not, the answer creeps up on you anyway. somehow. and, at the end of the day, how do you know if you are simply overthinking it (as usual) or if you've stumbled onto something worth thinking over and over?

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